RanDawg (wasabiabi) wrote,

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Can't Believe This Thing Is Still Here

The mindless ramblings of a 20 something college student struggling with his place in the world. Very little confidence and no concept of real life. What the fuck was wrong with me? Inexperience I suppose. I was 22 when I started this journal and it is easy to criticize myself 12 years later. The crazy thing is that I deleted the first 5 months because I was trying to forget my irrational drama. It wasn't forgotten. Looking back I really wish I hadn't deleted it. Although I didn't have all the answers back then I feel as if I had some of them and managed to push them aside as I got older. Needless to say I am in a much different place in my life now. Through trial and error I have found what truly makes me happy. There is a purpose to everything now rather than gaming, weed and trying to get laid. On April 30th I will have been married to Jessica for 10 years. We have not been able to have children of our own but decided to become foster parents due to the overwhelming need. We currently are fostering a 4 year old boy and his 2 month old sister. If their case goes to severance we will be adopting them. My father passed away a little over 2 years ago and I inherited the home I grew up in. After college I worked for a Fortune 500 insurance company as a claims adjuster for nearly 5 years before I couldn't take it anymore. I attempted to sell life and health insurance but that only lasted 6 months. After that I worked in a call center for a life insurance company for almost 3 years but got fired for losing my cool with an aggressive customer. It took 8 years but I found out that office work isn't meant for me. I can't sit in a cube all day attached to a phone. Everything changed when I discovered photography. It turns out I am a creative! Getting the business off the ground has been a process but staying home with the children has been one of the best experiences of my life. I also fell in love with hiking. Climbing mountains is an amazingly spiritual experience for me. That connection with creation is invaluable.

Don't worry 22 year old me, everything turns out just fine. It may not have gone the way you planned it but that would have been boring. You got to accomplish so many things you never even dreamed of. Although, you still need to lose those 40 pounds...
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